Losing my religion

Monday, July 27, 2009
This post is particularly odd to write. I feel an odd mix of emotions - joy, relief, nervousness, maybe even a tiny bit of guilt. Some of you will be happy for me, some of you will be sad for me. Who knows, maybe some of you won't ever speak to me again. But here it is, like a turd on a table.

So I was born Mormon, just like a good portion of you reading this.

Throughout my life, I had various levels of interest in being religious. I was quite adamant about it through my youth. I attended church somewhat regularly through my teen years, although I wasn't as into it as I was in the prior years.

When I moved out on my own, I started attending the local church to start meeting people. I went along with the religion thing, but I wasn't really convinced of the truth of it. I did this for several years. During this time, I went through several relationships, most of which failed for religious reasons ... either I wasn't religious enough, or I was too religious. Basically I was a fence sitter.

Finally around age 25, I felt I needed to make a decision and choose a side of the fence. I read a lot. I talked to a lot of people. I prayed a lot. I finally decided that Mormonism (and religion in general) wasn't for me. I stopped going to church and never really looked back, and I felt fine about it. I never officially resigned from the church because I felt it didn't matter - I'm just a name on a list somewhere of no significance.

That all changed last year with the Prop 8 debacle. The leadership of the church had taken vaguely neutral stances (at a political level) in the past, but this one was very polarizing. It was at this point that I realized I no longer wanted to be associated with an organization that espoused these views. I felt dirty that I was even listed among them.

I sat for a few months thinking it over, but my feelings of disgust never subsided. It was time to formally resign. I filled out a generic resignation letter and sent it in. They processed it quickly and without any harassment to reconsider.

So as of June 15, 2009, I am no longer Mormon. I feel relief to no longer be associated with an organization that I feel openly persecutes, and uses questionable rationale to justify themselves.


HeidiS said...

"I support you" seems a little trite, but I'll throw it out there anyway. Good for you for standing by your convictions!

jenny said...

i'm happy for you! taking a stand is always hard but always worth it, especially when it's something you've thought about for a long time.

the world needs more people like you. i'm in your fan club :)

[lisa] said...

I support you 100%! I do not feel the need to have religion in my life at this time... but IF (or when) I do... the LDS church would be the LAST on my list. The list would be quite small regadless. But between their flip flopping, how hateful/hurtful they are towards others that are not like them, and bizarre ideas that are in their book-that would never ever be the church for me. And Prop 8 sent me over the edge. I at one time could tolerate their organization. I would bite my tongue when the topic of the church came up (to a point). Not anymore. Any ugliness that comes their way-it is well deserved. Karma is a god damn bitch.

erin said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
erin said...

I like how it's addressed to "Brother Sullivan", like they're just appeasing you with this letter and still claiming you as a member ;)

I love you Dave, you're a good person, and that's really all that matters in life.

I wish more people had the strength to stand up for what they believe in.

Janelle said...

I support your decision I just hope you are not opposed to hanging out with some Mormons sometimes. We still want to be friends with you :)

Dave said...

Oh, I am not opposed to hanging out with Mormons at all. Most of you are pretty awesome. Well, at least among my friends. ;)

AuroraLeigh said...

I really need to do this.